Trust is relational – but what about the trust you hold in your relationship with yourself?

You know, those butterflies in your stomach that flutter your mind with the “what if” or “what could be”. I distinctly remember a moment of accepting those butterflies and committing to a change that I knew would deeply impact my life - I was terrified. The unknown can be terrifying, and leaving predictability behind (even if it’s unhealthy) can still feel like a major stressor. The fear of failure or letting others down can easily invade feelings of trust we want to cling to. We want to trust the change.

It can be easy to lose that sense of trust when you’re in the midst of change, even when the change you’re experiencing is exciting.

So how can we trust ourselves during change? I’d invite you to try the THRIVE model. 

I attended a conference where Nataly Kogan came running through the crowd in her highlighter yellow jumpsuit, pumping up the audience with cheers and ready to excitedly talk about emotional well-being and change. Right before that happened, I was honestly about to pack up and head out. It was a lot of woo energy that I was not quite ready for, yet she pulled me in with, “I just disrupted your day, thoughts, and likely expectations, and I want to examine how we react to moments of abrupt change like that.” She shared her theory of thriving through change:

• Treat yourself with compassion

• Hone in on what you can control

• Remember what’s good

• Imagine what’s possible

• Validate your emotions

• Energize yourself with your bigger why

Using self-trust-building exercises like this when facing change has been restorative and I hope we all find ways that best allow us to thrive through change.

For many, you’re often not experiencing change alone. Once you’ve got that bedrock of trust in yourself, it’s time to bring in your team.

How we can trust others during change:

As a heartful empath who also craves control, I understand that trusting in others to lead us and support us through change is challenging and requires vulnerability.

Relational expert Esther Perrel shares that trust isn’t a promise to never hurt each other, rather the risk and confidence that when we do hurt each other, we will come together to heal. Cultivating that level of trust requires millions of micro-risks that build confidence in each other. Ultimately, trust requires taking risks together that help us grow into better partners and teammates for each other.

Often as teammates and/or leaders, it’s easy to a.) assume trust exists through change or b.) fear lack of trust exists through change if we don’t have it all figured out. It’s important for us to check in on the shared risks and confidence in each other – cultivate micro-moments of trust through change.

Let’s embrace the butterflies and find ways to THRIVE through change together.